Just over six months have passed since I was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer. It’s been a time of self learning and assessment.
To be honest I wasn’t always sure I would make it to this point even though the medics were of a different opinion.
One thing that was made clear recently is that I can’t be ‘cured’. Like the contents of Pandora’s box, once opened/released, cancerous cells will travel wherever in the body. I’m only just getting my head round this fact.
However, the excellent treatment I’m being given is extending my life. It’s up to me to embrace this and use my time productively.
I’ve always been a last minute kind of girl and work better with a deadline looming. Should I now be more structured and timetable each day to get the most out of it?
Or should I just allow myself to be free to do whatever the moment suggests and enjoy it and those I come into contact with?
The adage “you can’t change the habits of a lifetime” comes to mind.
Yesterday I was positive and full of possibilities. I felt the gentle hand of God calming me, bringing me peace.
Today, the doubts and fears are edging in again. Help me, Lord, to draw from you courage and tranquility, hope and acceptance. Teach me to embrace only positive vibes.
Help me to remember my good fortune.
“Hear the voice of my pleading as I cry for help,
as I lift up my hands in prayer to your holy place.” (Psalm 27)
Momma B's blog of hope 
Pauline my heart goes out to you today. How does anyone know how to cope with the fluctuating feelings of such a diagnosis. Just be you and take each day as it comes, do whatever feels right for you. Take comfort from your lovely family who love you so much. We pray every day that your treatment will remain effective and stabilising. Love and prayers.
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So proud of you mum and how you have embraced this ‘journey’ with courage and hope. It’s a rollercoaster of emotions, as is life itself, but with dad and us at your side and all your family and friends, you will overcome the fear and anxiety and accentuate the positive as you always do!❤️
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Do whatever feels right at that moment, plan if you like but know it’s okay to change your mind. I’m proud of how you are handling everything and probably without realising you are doing more than you did before! Love you Mum 💚💚💚💚💚💚💚
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Hi Pauline you are so brave to carry on and be so positive you have a special family who will be with you all our prayers are with you and not forgetting your lovely Max will be by your side keep strong my lovely xx
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